Perfection

Ok, so if you know me well at all you will know that I am a perfectionist!  Everything has to be perfect at all times.  This includes my home, cleaning, work, school and everything in between.  I think it all falls under that whole control freak thing that I have going on (some people call it OCD!).  I don't normally set up to do things perfectly, things just typically come pretty easy for me.  Until now...

I am completely struggling on something so easy that I'm ready to pull my hair out and scream!  This is doing a number on me, and completely messing with my head.  I know I need to give myself a little credit, take a step back and relax, but hey, this is ME we are talking about.  Like that would ever happen, HA!

Deep breath in.... Deep breath out....

I know I can be a little hard on myself, and when I am in perfectionist mode, it's 100 times worse, but how many times do you, or should you, continue to make something work, when it's just not?   Not an easy question to answer, especially when your entire existence is surrounded by it working.  Who says you have to make it work?  I do! Ok, I know we can't always be perfect at everything, but try telling that to my head...

So, what do you do when your inner self is fighting for perfection, but your outer self is bucking it?  That's my struggle right now... I've got to get this, it's not an option to not get it.  It's a pass/fail kinda thing, and I'm failing.  Yes, I'm failing... Big accomplishment to get those words out.  Who is this person?  Me, failing?  How can this be?  I'm fighting it, I've got to fight it!  I can't fail (remember, OCD control-perfection freak?)!  I won't fail!

Deep breath in....  Deep breath out....

To be continued...............