Mental Vacation...

It's been a crazy week.  So many different emotions wrapped into a few days.  I've experienced fun, fear, love, excitement, hurt, disappointment, anger and sadness... That's a lot of feelings for a person to take spread over time, but even more shoved into just a few days. 

This morning I got up and walked outside and felt the warmth of the sun on my face.  It's a beautiful morning.  The sun is shining. It's warm, very warm. Birds are chirping in the trees,  Ducks are swimming in the lake.  All just seemed peaceful, quiet, serene.  For a brief moment, all those emotions disappeared, my mind was blank, and it was just that brief moment that I stopped and realized that this is my place...

A great friend, who is always there for me, brought me to that place last night.  That peaceful, quiet, serene-blank place.  That place that everyone needs to find within themselves.  That place to clear your thoughts and think about nothing but just that moment.  For me, it's my beach.  The warm sand.  Blue water.  Clear sky.  Sound of the waves crashing.  The space that never ends, and goes on forever.  The beach where everything is possible, everything is open, everything is just waiting for you.

How is it that we lose sight of that place, and why is it sometimes so hard to find or get back to?  Why do we allow our emotions to consume us, when what we really need to do is face our emotions, and then immediately go to our place, our place where everything is just perfect?  I'm not saying that everything is perfect, because in reality, nothing is perfect.  But inside each of us, there is a place where perfection exists, our own personal perfection.  Our own place where we can retire to, even if only for a moment, where we can just be, sit and stare into that ocean and watch everything just float away into the water... Our own mental vacation.

So, for my moment, all is ok.  All is right.  All is perfect.  Any stress has floated away.  I've breathed in the clean, fresh air.  I've listened to the pulse of the water.  My mind and heart is open and clear.  It's a new day, a new moment, the start of new experiences.  I'm ready for whatever you've got to throw at me.  New feelings and emotions.  New sunrise and sunset.  New tides. New possibilities.

Believing...

Why is it that what should be a great character trait can also be one of your biggest flaws?  Is believing that people are good really such a bad thing?  Today, an amazing and long-time friend told me that seeing good in people is a great thing.  I know that is really true, but sometimes I question it and doubt myself. 

I wonder... Would I better keep myself protected if I always went into situations thinking the worst of people, until they proved themselves to me?  Is that really how I want people to see me, as the doubter?  The questioner?  I know that's not how I want to see myself, so I wouldn't want others to see me that way.

But, where do you draw the line between immediately seeing good in people and being their doormat?  It's a blurred line and a line that is easily crossed.  Are belief, trust and honesty things that should immediately be given to someone or should they have to prove themselves?  And if they have to prove themselves before those things are given, what does it take to get to that point, and once you're there, are you really worth their time because of your doubt?

It's a question that I can't answer, because for me I'm not sure what the right answer is.  I can say that I see all people as good, and believe and trust, until I'm proven otherwise.  Because that's how I see things, I can honestly say that I have been the doormat too many times.  But, what kind of person would I be if I didn't?

In reality, I know that there are people out there that have no worries in walking all over other people, and sometimes find enjoyment in it.  I feel sorry for those type of people, because what are they missing out on, and what types of people are they walking on?  People that they may need someday, but will not have the opportunity.

So, I guess I will continue to see the good in people.  I will continue to believe and trust.  And if that means that I get walked on, I guess that's how it will be.  It may be one of my best character traits and one of my biggest flaws, but it's me.  I guess you take me as I am, or you don't take me at all.  Your choice.

Question of Truth...

Truth... such a difficult word for some people to follow.  Why I wonder?  It should come so easy to everyone, after all, there is no thought behind it, it's how things actually are.  There's no making things up, telling stories, and then trying to remember the story you told, so that you don't catch yourself in an un-truth.

I have come to realize however that not everyone likes to take the easy road, and prefers the long difficult road of deceit and lies verses the road of truth.  So I question, what type of person tends to lead down the wrong road?  And what is their motivation for doing so?  Do they ever think that by going down the wrong road it will eventually lead them to the edge?  The edge of no return?  And when the edge is reached, do they care about the people left behind to pick up the pieces of un-truth and move forward?

So, let's go down this wrong road, the road of deceit and lies and the people left to pick up the pieces.  Does finding the pieces of un-truth wear them down or make them stronger? I'm sure some would think that it would wear them down, but in reality, picking the pieces up and putting them together like a puzzle only leads them to the truth, and this truth can only make them stronger!

Truth!  A powerful word!

A word that instead of tearing people apart actually brings them closer together.  A word that defines who you are and separates you from the deceit and lies.  A word that raises you up and shows the world that you cannot be broken.

So my friends, the question of truth is this...   If the truth will always set you free, then why do so many people think that the road of deceit and lies is the right path?  You will eventually be caught.  You will eventually go over that edge.  Is it/was it worth it?

Truth... A wonderful word!

A question that is no question!

To my friends... you will always find me heading down the road of truth, and will always help you down my road.  Nothing good comes from heading down the road of deceit and lies, except that it will never break true friendship.  True friendship cannot be broken, regardless of how many un-truths are told.

To my friends... I will always be there for you.  I love you all!

TRUTH!!!!  Always the right road!  Take it!  :)

Disappointment

Disappointment.... such an ugly word, and yet a word or a feeling that crosses our minds often.  Why do we allow ourselves to be disappointed?  Is it the need to be needed or wanted?  Is it that we are so consumed with the fact that things have to be perfect that we set ourselves up for failure?  But if we never strive for some type of perfection, and never end up disappointed, will we ever truly know what perfection is?  Or at least some sort of perfection? 

But I wonder... do some people really set out to purposely disappoint others?  It seems like I cross these types of people every day, but do they really mean it, or is that just how it is?  And if they aren't purposely trying to disappoint, but do, do they realize that this is what has happened?  Just wondering...  

I know that I am tired of being disappointed, but if I don't try, I'll never really know whether it was true disappointment or the way things were really supposed to be...  And is there really a difference?

Do people think about their actions and maybe how other people are feeling?  And do they really care?  Is disappointment such a common occurrence that no one really pays attention to it any more?  I guess I can't speak for others, but only for myself.  I hope that I don't ever disappoint you or anyone else, I'm sure it will happen at some point, but know that it wasn't meant to. 

Think about it... if disappointment is a part of life, and we have to accept it, then we also have to accept the fact that maybe being disappointed prepares us for something else, something else that was supposed to happen, or in some other direction that things were really supposed to go.

Either way, it's still an ugly word, but a word that I guess we need to accept, at least in some way, because regardless of how much we try, we will eventually be disappointed.  Maybe...